Beginning of the end
by sethsduck17
Summary: it's the end of senior year and things sure have changed... please r&r, this is my first LM fanfic. FINSIHED! if you don't like the happy go lucky stuff...read this...(gotta try 1 last time to plug...)
1. Default Chapter

"Damn."

The cigarette came to life as she inhaled while simultaneously swiping at the embers that fell on her bare arm. She exhaled and leaned back on her elbows to look at the night sky. This year was a bitch. Graduation was right around the corner and still no college plans.

"What about your future? What are you going to do with your life?!" her father would shout at her. She usually stood and took the verbal assault and then climbed out here, to her secret place. The one place where nobody thought to look...the one place she could watch the rest of the world unfold with no problems. She stretched as she sat back up and looked with interest as a car pulled up and stopped next door. Steven Townsend. God what a prick. So popular, so good looking, such an asshole. It was a shame really. They were together before. But when she started seeing girls go in and not come out, she broke it off. He hemmed and hawed about it, sure, but when she told him about his many whores, he didn't deny it. Now they only spoke when necessary. And it usually involved a snide comment or rude remark.

"Let's see the new skank," she muttered as the passenger door opened. Her mouth dropped when she saw who it was. This girl was a goody-good! Maybe she's lost. People like her don't come around here for the likes of Sir-Many-Ho's. The couple smiled at each other as he walked her towards his house and then he stopped, almost as an afterthought. He looked up at the roof next door, saw the girl staring and wagged his fingers at her. She scowled, aimed her still lit cigarette at him and threw it.

"Bitch!" he called up as he sidestepped the well aimed flying missal. She smiled and gave him the finger in return as he scowled and walked inside.

"Kate!!" her mother's voice drifted out the window. The girl stood up and crawled back inside.

"Coming!"

"Woo...yeah!!" The crowd surged towards the kitchen, knocking the boy aside.

"That's alright, I'm fine!" he called as he got up dusting himself off. Rachel Monroe threw some kick ass parties, he had to admit, but everyone and their mother always showed up. So instead of it being a regular awesome party, it usually turned into a mosh pit free for all just about. He sighed as he walked inside grabbing himself a drink. He swallowed the liquor hard, making a face as he stopped, suddenly seeing why everyone was surging towards the kitchen. There she was. Standing in the middle, doing a beer-bong contest with Jake Storm. It figures. It always turned out like this. She said that she would stop and settle down and she never did. He smiled as he thought about middle school, what seemed like a million and a half years ago. This never would have happened. They would all be hanging out at someone's house watching movies. High school sure had changed everybody.

"Gordo!" she yelled happily as she saw him when she finally set down the bong.

He nodded his head at her while he took a sip of his drink and then looked away. He hated seeing her like this. Drunk beyond all recognition. Countless times he had to bring her home and let her spend the night at his house because her parents would kill her if they smelt her coming through the door. Good thing his house had a basement that he used as a bedroom...

"Come on, time to go," he said as he started to pull her away.

"I'm not done here yet!"

"Oh yes you are," Gordo replied as he pulled her down the street.

"God you are such a drag!!"

"You'll thank me later. Is this what the next four years are going to be like? Me cleaning up after you...taking you home after parties?"

"It's not like you're doing anything anyway," she said as she tripped, attempting to follow his brisk pace. He frowned when he heard this and just jammed his hands into his shorts even futher.

"Liz..."

"What? Are you too good for me?? You can't dump me, it's not like we're going out," she said trying to stand in front of him, but ending up on the far right side instead.

He sighed as he walked over to her. "It's a good thing we're not. Now let's get you home before you pass out." He wrapped his arm around her and led her back to his house.

"Gordo! Did you get the test tubes?" Miranda asked as she walked into the basement the next morning. She stopped short when she saw Gordo still in bed, sleeping in only boxers, with a sleeping girl next to him. She sighed and shook Gordo's shoulder, waking him up.

"Ummphh..." he mumbled.

"Get up. You were supposed to be ready like thirty minutes ago!! And what the hell is going on?"

"Miranda?" he asked finally sitting up in bed. "Oh shit!" was the first words out of his mouth as soon as he saw her there, taping her loafer clad foot impatiently.

"What happened? Did she..."

"Yeah. Again," he sighed.

Miranda sat down on Lizzie's side of the bed and ran her hand through her hair.

"Miranda?" she asked sleepily.

"What are you doing?" she asked softly. It was a loaded question, but one that had been asked many times before. Most of the time it went unanswered, and this morning was no exception.

"Listen, me and Miranda have to do a science thing so..." Gordo trailed off.

"I get it. Ditching me like always huh?"

"Lizzie!! This project is due in like one week!! If you went to class, maybe you would know about it," Miranda said.

"Whatever. I need to go anyway," she said as she rolled out of bed picking up her shirt she lost the night before.

Miranda and Gordo just watched her leave and shook their heads.

"I am so tired of this," she muttered.

"I know."

"No, I really am. She goes out, gets trashed and then we have to pick up the pieces. She might as well just live with you now. I mean we have other things to do!" she exclaimed.

"We're all she has," he replied softly.

"What about her little beer drinking friends?" she asked bitterly. "Why can't they help her? I have to focus on getting into Yale, you have your music...and she has her liquor."

"It's not like we don't do partake Miranda. You are getting into Yale, don't worry about it. As for me, that whole music thing was a joke anyways. She needs us Andy," he said using her nickname he gave her.

"No. She needs help. Help we can't give her."

"So what are we gonna do?" he demanded.

"I don't know. But I can't just sit here and watch anymore. I know that you almost had something a million and one years ago, but it's over now! If you really love her, you really care, then help her," Miranda said as she led the way out of the basement.


	2. crossing the line

Ch 2- Crossing the Line

"I saw you at Steven's the other night," Kate said as she sidled up to Miranda the next day at school.

"Steven? Who are you talking about?"

"Townsend."

"Oh yeah right, like I'd go there. Please," she replied as she started walking faster.

"Black skirt, low cut red top...I gotta say Sanchez, you could quite possibly skank up good. I mean if the other night was any sort of indicator."

Miranda stopped and made her way back to the blonde former cheerleader. "Look, what I do with my life is none of your damn business. I'm sorry that you're life is shit, but don't even try to make mine."

"What are you gonna do? Go cry to your little Harvard elite group? Please, I'm not scared of you."

"Whatever. Why do I even bother talking to you? You're just a lowlife has been that tries to take people down," the brunette sneered. Kate put her hand over her heart in mock hurt.

"Oh! I think I have to cry! Look- I just wanted to tell you something about your new toy."

"He's not my toy!! And even if he was- why would I listen to you?"

"I've been there. He'll toss you aside in a few weeks, a month if you're lucky," Kate replied disdainfully.

"Just because you weren't good enough-"

"Oh, ok!! Don't come crying when your perfect little heart gets broke," she said as she walked through the doors. Miranda was left in the hallway alone, fuming. She kicked a locker and then stalked out herself. Next time, she'd have to be more careful who saw her whereabouts.

Gordo slammed his text book shut and rubbed his eyes. The clock on the wall said 12:30. He really needed to get to bed. He stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed as he snapped off his light.

"Gordo!" she whispered. "Gordo!!" she said again as no movement came from the bed. Finally the curly haired boy opened his eyes sleepily.

"Liz?"

"Yeah," she whispered back smiling.

"It's like two in the morning, what the hell are you doing here?"

"I've been thinking..."

Gordo rolled his eyes and tuned her out as she continued. Usually what happened when she "was thinking" she ran away, and lived with him for a week or two or plotted some sort of extreme revenge on her latest guy that she hated for some reason.

"Whatever Liz. You can stay," he sighed.

"Did you even listen to me?" the blonde demanded. "I said I love and I wanna be with you."

That sentence made him sit up straight and look at her. "You're drunk," he muttered.

"No I'm not," she responded as she inched closer to him. He found himself leaning in until their lips finally met. Immediately he grabbed her and started kissing her harder. He had waited so long to finally kiss this girl. But she never liked him like that; he was Gordo after all! But now, here they were lying entangled in his bed like rabbits.

"Take me," she said between kisses.

"What?!"

"Take me! God Gordo I'm about to burst," she said as she ran her hands all over him. He looked at his best friend lying his bed, horny beyond all belief. He couldn't seriously do this could he?

They collapsed next to each other, panting for breath. He turned to look at her and stared in her eyes. He had loved his girl since elementary and dreamed of this happening since freshmen year. But as he stared in her eyes, something clicked.

"Jesus McGuire!"

"What?" she said as she sat up.

"You're high! Oh my God..." he moaned pacing around the basement.

"I am not!" she said indignantly. "I did that like an hour ago, I'm fine!"

"No you're not!" he yelled at her. "You don't come down in an hour or two, I know remember?" he said referring to last year.

"Are you saying this was a mistake?" she challenged him.

He swallowed hard as he responded. "I love you Liz. I always have. But right now, I don't care if I ever see you again. Do you know how long I've wanted this? Since I was 14! 14 Lizzie!! You can't just use me as one of your one night stands, when you're stoned none the less!"

"So..." she said confused.

"Get out," he said quietly. "Get the fuck out of my house!!" he yelled at her when she didn't move. When finally left, he sank down on his bed. He hated her. She had used him with out a second thought. _Fuck this_ he thought as he landed a solid punch on his wall. She had crossed that line.

"What's up with Gordo?"

"Excuse me?" Miranda asked.

"What's with Gordo? He's all pissy today."

"Do you have any idea what you did to him??"

"Ummm...." Lizzie trailed off obviously confused.

"You have no recollection of last night?" Miranda said skeptically.

"No..."

"Ok. Readers Digest says that you went to his house last night, stoned, and ended up having sex with him."

Lizzie just looked at her friend. "He's mad at me for having sex with him?"

"He loves you Lizzie!! God damn you are so stupid!!!! He's one of the few people that still care about you and then you just went over there and took advantage of him. And you wanna know why he has stick up his ass?? Think about it!" Miranda snapped as she stalked off, her perfectly combed hair flouncing off the shoulders of the violet cardigan she wore.

"Gordo's in love with me?" Lizzie said aloud to herself.


	3. rock bottom

Ch 3- Rock bottom

"Gordo?" Lizzie asked that afternoon. Gordo just kept rummaging in his locker, not giving her a glance.

"Look can we talk?" she tried again.

"Nothing to say," he said as he walked away.

"Look I'm sorry about last night!!" she called after him.

"Yeah? Which part? The part where you took advantage of me or the part where you said you loved me?" he asked as he came back to her.

"I said that?"

"It's over Liz. This whole thing...it's done. I'm not going to sit around and wipe your face every time you puke on yourself. That's not what I'm here for!! I have a life you know!!! I gave my music to be here with you and you just get stoned and screw me. Figuratively and literally," he added as he took a breath.

"I'm sorry about everything ok? I promise, I'll get clean. I'll stop partying, stop smoking, stop sleeping around...everything ok?" she said as she came up and put her hands on his face.

He pushed her off him. "It's always the same. God I think you've said that about twenty different times between Christmas and now."

"Well no one asked you to stay," she said haughtily.

"No. They didn't. I stayed because I wanted to look after you, because I thought, hey maybe when she sobers up, I'll have a chance. Big joke right Liz? Like you'd sober up. Like you'd even let me have a chance. The only thing you even keep me around for is to give you a place to sleep when you're not around sleeping with every fucking guy in the school," he spat out looking at her with his eyes ablaze.

She looked back at him, she had never seen him this angry before. She knew she caused it, but didn't know what to say. There's always the slapping option...but he was right in a way. But she went with it anyway. Nobody says that to her, not even David Gordon. After she delivered the fiery slap to his face, he just looked at her tear soaked face and said, "I'm gone. I'm done. Have a great life," before walking out of the doors of the school.

Kate Sanders was on her roof again. It was twilight and her parents weren't home, but she couldn't smoke in the house. What little conscience she did have wouldn't let her do that. Looking around as she blew the smoke out of her mouth, she noticed Lizzie standing there in her yard looking up at her.

"What do you want McGuire?" she yelled down.

"Depends on what you have!"

Kate thought about this and stubbed out her cigarette and climbed through her window.

"Look I don't deal," she said as she opened her door.

"Bull. I see you everyday smoking out. I know that you have it," she said pushing her way past Kate into her home.

"I get one a day from Bryan. I do not deal, " she repeated. "Besides, why do you want it?" she asked suspiciously.

"None of you damn business."

"Huh-uh. If you come here looking for drugs, I need a better answer than that."

"Fine. Gordo wants me to drop dead and Miranda hates me. My parents might as well disown me because I'm never there, I'm failing senior year, take your pick."

"I know I'm not one to talk, but that's not going to solve it. Getting high I mean."

"Look, do you or do you not have anything."

"I told you I don't. But Lizzie..."

"Whatever," she said as she turned and walked away.

Kate watched the blonde walk away and shut her door. She went to the phone and picked up her phone book. If she wanted to get through to Lizzie, then she was going to need some special forces.

"Hello?"

"Hey Miranda."

"How did you get this number?" she sighed.

"I remembered it. Look I need your help."

"I thought it was me that would come crawling to you," Miranda answered sarcastically.

"Listen, Lizzie's really outa it. She came by just now and wanted my stash."

"You have a stash?"

"Well, no. I have one. She just assumed I dealed so she came here."

"So?"

"She's your best friend Sanchez!! Pretend to have a heart. I want to help her, you want to help her. Why don't we just solidify?"

"Excuse me?"

"Join forces..."

"Right like you really care about Lizzie. Thanks Kate, but I think me and Gordo have this one down," she said going to hang up.

"Really? Then why was she over her with bloodshot eyes like she was crying and saying that Gordo wanted her to drop dead and you hate her?"

"High?" Miranda guessed as she took a stab in the dark.

"Damn it Miranda, she needs help!! If you won't listen, then just forget it," Kate said as she hung up on her. People thought that since Kate got kicked off the cheerleading squad all those years ago and became a smoker, drinker and partier that she was a cold hearted bitch. Actually, they already thought that she was a cold hearted bitch. However, the truth was that Kate still watched out for her old friends. Miranda and her were at each others throats all the time and hated each other, but Kate always had her back. Her ties go deep, way beyond the outward appearance, and she wasn't about to let one go.


	4. secrets

Ch 4- Secrets

Lizzie sat in the school bathroom and threw up. She's 18...she didn't need this. She hurled the stick across the stall and it bounced off the walls and came back to her feet. The girl just stared at it for a minute and then began to cry softly.

"Lizzie!! Hey, I have the stuff you were looking for," Kate sang out the next day.

"What?" Lizzie said in return.

"At my house. What you wanted...I have it."

"Right!! Ok...uuummmm...how much do I owe you?"

"Forget it girl. Think of it as early grad present," Kate answered as she walked away.

"So did you do it?" her partner asked.

"Yes I did it. I told I would didn't I?"

"Well I just know how you are and everything..."

"Jealous? Wanna live life on the wild side and party Sanchez?" Kate said sarcastically.

"I do party," Miranda replied offended.

"Oh honey, a pajama jammy-jam with juice boxes don't count," she said as she wrapped an arm around Miranda.

"Go to hell. Listen, you said you wanted to help Lizzie. That's the only reason why we're even talking. So let's just stay on topic."

"Fine by me little Ms. Priss."

Miranda let that comment slide and instead asked, "So what did you put in there anyway?"

"Family recipe."

She gave Kate a dirty look to which she responded, "Relax!! Regular tobacco only with some basil and shit. No oregano...ok Mom?"

"This better work Sanders," Miranda replied as she walked away. Kate hoped it would too. She had put regular spices in there in hopes to throw Lizzie off into thinking she was really smoking weed, but really just regular tobacco. The thing was, was that Lizzie was an "experienced" smoker so she might catch on to it. But for all their sakes, Kate really hoped that she didn't.

Lizzie tossed the bag aside as she entered her room. She didn't want it. Well, she did, but at the same time knew that it was really fucking up her life. She was addicted and she knew it. Lizzie reached into the bag and pulled out a rolled up joint and found her lighter. This would make her feel better...anything would really make her feel better. But as she brought the lighter to the joint clenched in her fingers, her hand started to shake and she slowly put it down.

"No," she said as she gathered it up and walked over to Kate's.

"Miranda!"

The petite brunette stopped and quickly turned around.

"What are you doing?"

"Going home."

"What's say you and me go somewhere??" the boy asked.

Miranda swallowed and smiled as she got into the car. Where they were going, she didn't care.

Gordo sighed as he sat against his bedroom wall. After what he said to Lizzie yesterday, he came home and got sick. Gordo threw up over a girl. Yeah, that never happened before. But he felt like a dick for what he said to her and wanted to take it back. The problem was that he said that he didn't want to see her again. That was a lie. She was his best friend, the closest thing he had to a sister. It actually got to the point where she slept over so often that he kind of missed the feel of her in his bed late at night. Then his mind flashed back to the two of them swirling around in his bed, naked as they made love. Suddenly, he remembered why he didn't want to see her. She took the only thing that he still had away from him. Granted, he consented, but to her, he was just another guy on her list. How could he face her and watch her throw herself at guys when he just wanted to have her all to himself. And try as he might, he couldn't get the image of the two of them doing that, that fateful night, of his head. And as much as he hated to admit it, he wanted more.

"What's the matter with it?" Kate demanded as Lizzie threw the bag on her kitchen counter.

"Nothing. It's just that...I'm trying to quit."

Kate just laughed. "No offense Lizzie but you trying to quit equals me being a cheerleader again."

"I'm serious. God my life is so screwed up it isn't even funny. I want it back. I want to know what the hell I'm doing night after night and I wanna know who with. Besides, I can't anymore," she said softly.

"Why?"

"Look I just can't ok? Just take your bag and leave me alone," she snapped as she turned to walk out.

"I know it sounds cliché and all, but you can trust me. It's not like I have anyone to tell. Well except the night sky when I talk to it at night."

Lizzie just smiled a sad smile as she walked out. Kate shook her head...was Lizzie really trying to clean up her act or had she just caught on to their little plot?

"Liz!!" Gordo yelled as he jogged up to her when he saw her walking down the street.

"If you want to insult me, get in line."

"I'm sorry," he stated, catching her off guard.

"What?"

"For yesterday. I was an asshole and I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it," she replied as she continued walking.

"Is everything ok?" he asked hesitantly.

"Why do you care?" she replied harshly.

"I said I'm sorry!! What else do you want me to do?"

"Sorry doesn't make it ok Gordo!! God do you want to know how many things I wish I could take back with a sorry?? It doesn't work, it never works!!" she finished as a yell.

"Do you wanna come inside and talk?" he said quietly after her outburst.

"No. There's nothing to talk about, right?"

"Lizzie..."

"Save it. You want me out of your life, and now I am. Happy?" she said as she stalked down the street.

"I love you!" he yelled down the street. Oh my God, he really just did that. He really just told her how he felt. This would be interesting.

"Fuck you!!" she screamed as she came back and slapped again, for the second time in a week.

"What?? Can't take it?? I love you Liz!!!"

"That won't fix things!!! What's done is already done Gordo!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" he said confused. Were they still talking about her not being in his life?

"I'm pregnant ok?" she spat out.

"What?" he said turning pale.

"Yeah. Happy?"

"So is it mine?" he said cautiously.

"I'm not that big of a slut thank you," she answered in response. The next thing she saw was Gordo hit the ground as he passed out.

"Same time tomorrow?" the boy asked Miranda.

"Umm..." she paused while buttoning up her blouse.

"Double or nothing..." the guy wheedled.

"Fine," she answered as he walked by and gave her an appreciative glance.

She knew it was wrong. She hated doing it. She hated being labeled most of all, so that's why no one knew about it...not even Gordo. But hey, Yale isn't going to pay for itself is it??


	5. one last hurrah

a/n: remember y'all...andy is miranda! andy is gordo's nickname for her....

Ch 5- One Last Hurrah

"Gordo are you ok?" Miranda asked that night as they watched tv.

Gordo just stared at the tv in a daze. "Hello?? Earth to David!!!" Miranda called out.

"Huh?"

"What is going on?? You're like in another world or something."

"Nothing," he muttered.

"I know you Gordo, I know when something isn't right."

"If you breath a word of this to anyone, I swear to God Miranda I'll tell everyone how you're paying for Yale," he threatened.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said irritably.

"Andy. Short skirts, low tops, strange markings on your skin that can't be covered with makeup. I know what you're doing. I'm not stupid you know," he said.

"Since you're so smart why don't you tell me exactly how I'm paying for it then?"

"Look, I just don't want you to say anything that's why I brought it up. I don't need a fight right now ok?"

"Right. You don't need a fight. You just know everything about everyone's business..."

"What the hell are you talking about?" he said getting annoyed.

"Just because you assume-"

"Miranda you're selling yourself!!! Ok, there, I know!! Now can we get on with our lives?"

Miranda sat there quietly. So he did know. He disapproved, she knew it. He probably thought that she was a slut and was as bad Lizzie...

"I'm not like her ok?" she said quietly.

"What?"

"Lizzie. I'm not like her. I don't go out and have one night stands. I need to do this for college..."

"She's pregnant," he broke in equally quiet.

"She's what?"

"Pregnant."

"I knew this would happen. God she should know better, at least I'm on the pill and make the guys wear-"

"It's mine."

That stopped Miranda in her tracks. "I'm so sorry," she gasped. "What are you going to do?"

"The only thing I can do...support her," he said tiredly.

With that Miranda leaned on him and laid on his chest. He kissed her head and brushed her hair. "Whatever you need..."

"I know Andy, I know."

Lizzie sat in a cloud of smoke and smiled. She was calm...she was "zen" if you will. When she saw the figure that clamored into her domain, she suppressed a frown.

"What do you want?"

"What the hell are you doing?" her visitor demanded narrowing their eyes.

"What do you care?"

"Elizabeth Brooke!!"

"David Zephyr," she shot back.

"You have a baby!! What the hell are you doing!!!???" he screamed at her.

"It's already going to be fucked up! Hell I'm fucked up! Why not?" she demanded.

Gordo stalked over to her and for the first time in his life, he hit a girl. He slapped her and left the resounding sound in the air while she just stared at him. She looked at him coldly and he just stood there shaking with anger. He couldn't believe that she would do this. Didn't she care? How could she just throw this new life away? She had crossed the line before but he took her back. But this time, it was so much more. He helped make this baby and she was just throwing it away. How could she do that with no remorse? All these thoughts flooded Gordo's mind as he ran out of her room, tears flooding his eyes. He actually got attached to the idea of becoming a father. He wasn't ready for it, no. But he wanted that baby.

"Gordo?" Kate asked as he walked into a door.

"Hey Kate!!" he slurred.

"Man, you are beyond drunk," she said as she supported him as he fell against her. "What is going on?"

"Liz's pregnant. She's slowly killing our child. So I figure, fuck!! Might as well go out and have fun right??"

"You are not making any sense at all."

"No but I can upstairs..."

"Yeah Gordo, that's sick. I'm not doing anything with you. We're friends, nothing else. Plus, you reek."

"It's not like you don't do this stuff already," he said as he got near her face.

"I know I do, with Bryan! My boyfriend!!!" he responded.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," Gordo said as he tripped. Kate had to maintain her death grip on his shirt to keep him from going face first into the floor. She hadn't seen him like this in like three years, something drastic must have happened.

"Gordo. I need you to think for me. What is going on with you??"

"Nothing! I'm having fun Kate," he crowed happily.

"What happened with Lizzie?"

"Pregnant!"

"She's what?!" she exclaimed.

"Yup and I get to be a daddy," he said as he swung his arm out to the side, his drink sloshing over the side of his cup.

"Oh my God," she said softly.

"Yup. I am a baby's daddy," he managed as he started to laugh.

"Oh boy." _This was going to be one long night_, Kate thought as she escorted Gordo into the living room.


	6. giving up

a/n: hey, random thought. if anyone thinks that i need to raise the rating on this story again, please tell me. explain what i should fix please...

Ch 6- Giving up

Lizzie sighed as she sat down at the lunch table, alone. Ever since Gordo had found her getting stoned last month, he had refused to talk to her. Miranda was being short and snappy with her and Kate just usually didn't talk to her that much anyway.

"Is this seat taken?"

Lizzie looked up in surprise at Miranda. "If you're gonna insult me again, go away," Lizzie told her.

"I'm sorry ok? I was a bitch. I should have been there for you instead of ignoring you," she apologized.

"I'm trying Miranda, I really am," Lizzie told her strongly.

"Really?" she said curiously.

"Yeah, really. I don't want this baby to be messed up like I am. I'm going to stop being a slut, pothead and drunk."

"It takes time to break those Lizzie...are you sure you can do it?"

"Yeah. I know I can. I'll just slow down on the smoking and drinking until eventually I'll be able to stop. I mean Gordo hates me now...I can't take that. He's the father, I need him Miranda."

Miranda managed a small smile at her friend. It seemed as though Lizzie was sincerely trying to quit. This was a first for her, she usually just claimed she didn't have a problem and that she was fine. Maybe she really was going to stop...

"Gordo, she needs you," Miranda said to him that afternoon after school.

"No, she needs the damn bottle remember?" he asked bitterly.

"She's really trying to stop this time. She has a plan and everything...she's actually sincere this time. She's doing it for the baby...and for you," Miranda persuaded.

"She doesn't care about me or that child. All she cares about is making herself feel good. I'm tired of it, I don't need it," he said softly as he got up and walked away.

"So this what you're gonna do? Walk away from your baby?" she challenged.

"No. I'm walking away from the slut that made the baby," he answered as he exited the door.

"Too bad you helped her," she said to herself.

"Gordo?" Lizzie asked as she walked up to him that night.

In response he just turned and walked the opposite direction.

"Gordo, don't walk away!!" she called after him. "You helped me make this baby!!" That stopped him and he slowly turned to look at her. Lizzie slowly smiled a small smile, hoping that she made at least some progress.

"I need you Gordo. I can't do this alone. I'm trying to stop ok? But I can't do it alone."

"So just all the sudden you're going to quit? It doesn't work like that Liz!" he called to her.

"That's why I need you."

"No. You can't just expect me to believe that you're going to quit. A month ago I caught smoking up in your bedroom!!"

"And I believe a month ago Kate had to hold you up at her house because you were so shit face drunk," she replied.

"That is different!!" he yelled back getting frustrated.

"I don't see how. I got high, you got drunk."

"You're the one that has the baby!! Damn it Lizzie do you even care about it?!" he asked her, slipping back into what he used to call her in middle school.

"Of course I care!! Why else would I be trying to do this?" she said as tears came to her eyes.

"Save face," he guessed.

"You know what?" she said getting fired up. "No, wait. You know what, you're not worth it. If you can't be man enough to help me and your child out then fuck you. A real man would step up," she said through her teeth as she stalked away leaving Gordo standing there looking after her.

Gordo knocked hesitantly on her door. He had thought about what she said and she was right. He was responsible for this too. He can't just walk away from it...he had to deal. With that thought in mind, he braced himself for the slap he had been getting lately from her as she opened the door.

"Liz-" was all he could get out before she shut the door in his face.

"Liz!! Open the door!" he yelled as he pounded on it. He stopped and then pounded again.

"What?" she asked through the closed door.

"Come on, please? Open it," he said again.

Slowly, the door inched open and she stared at him. "What?" she asked softly.

"You were right. I need to be with you, I need to help you. It's my fault that this happened too...I need to take responsibility."

She just looked at him, cocked her head to one side and put on her skeptical face.

"No, I'm serious Liz. I want this baby to know it's father, I want the mother to know the father..."

"Gordo...I do know you."

"I want the father and the mother to be together and give this child a normal home..." he said as he paused.

"What?"

"I want to be with you Liz. I love you, I already told you that."

"Gordo...are you asking me out?" she asked.

He just ducked his head in response. He had wanted this for so many years, to ask her out, but he never got up the courage to do it. Now he did, after he just called her a slut and impregnated her and told her to her face that she'd never quite smoking up. Yep, he sure had great timing.

"David," she said. He looked up for that one, she never called him that unless she was extremely pissed off. When he did so, she caught his chin and kissed him softly.

"Is that a yes?" he questioned. She smiled softly and kissed him again, this time he kissed her back.

"Hey Gordo?"

"Mm?"

"This time, no sex," she said. He just looked at her and laughed.

"Shut up McGuire."


	7. underneath it all

Ch 7- Underneath It All

Lizzie hated this. She hated being pregnant, she how nobody trusted (even if she did bring that one herself) and she hated how she had to put up a front for Gordo and Miranda. Sure thins were great between her and Gordo...but she felt as though she were trapped. She often rocked herself to sleep at night, crying. And of course, nobody had any idea. They thought she was fine and dandy. Oh Lizzie was as far from fine and dandy as one person can get.

"Happy Anniversary!!" Gordo called out that morning as he walked into her house. It had been six months since they started going out and he couldn't be more proud of her. She took on her responsibilities, stopped smoking and actually got sober.

"Gordo?" she asked as she waddled down the stairs.

"Hey Hun," he said kissing her good morning, then kissing her belly.

"What are you doing her? Don't you have a class?"

"Nah, I skipped it. Besides isn't today when we find out about the baby?"

"Yeah," she sighed as she sat down.

"What's wrong?" he asked taking a seat beside her.

"It's just...I'm so tired lately. Renee put me on some night shifts..."

"Did you explain your situation?"

"Gordo she can _see_ my situation," she replied.

"I don't know what to say..."

"It's ok. After the baby's here I can go back to school and be with you. Mom already said she'd take care of the baby."

Gordo just nodded, unsure of what to say. "I talked to Andy last night," he said trying to start up a conversation.

"How's she doing?"

"She's alright. Bummed about Yale, but she's alright."

After Lizzie made the effort to straighten up her act, Miranda had done so as well. Nobody knew but Gordo, but it was ok. She didn't like being the valedictorian who was a secret whore. No matter how many times she told herself it was for school, she always came back to the whore. Finally, she let go of Yale and instead used her "dirty" money to go to NYU.

"Now come one, time to go," he said as he helped her up.

"Congratulations Elizabeth. You have a healthy baby girl," the doctor said as the picture came up on the sonogram screen. Gordo just stared at it, eyes wide. That was his creation. He had never seen anything like it.

"She's beautiful," he breathed.

"Gordo, she's a blob," Lizzie laughed.

"A beautiful blob," he retorted as Lizzie shook her head.

The couple left the doctors office and Gordo took her home. "I'll see you later?" he asked her. She nodded in agreement as he left.

"Love you!"

"Love you too," she called back. She leaned against her shut door. Though she felt trapped, she still loved him. It amazed her that she could actually feel this way; especially for someone she had known her whole life.

"Liz it's me...pick up if you're home..." Kate hung up after that. She had been in the middle of class when she got that feeling. Lizzie was in trouble. Normally when she got those feelings for anyone else they were wrong. Now Lizzie wasn't her best friend, but a good enough of one to where her feelings were never wrong. Kate had just picked up her books and slunk out the back, hoping her professor didn't notice. Now she was en-route to her friends house and got no answer. Kate just shrugged and kept on driving.

"Lizzie?" she called as she walked in. No answer. Her car was in the drive so she was there. Kate started to do a room by room search until she finally got to the bathroom. She knocked on it when she noticed the sliver of light beneath the door.

"Liz?"

Still no answer. With that, Kate tried the door handle. Lizzie looked up as her friend walked in.

"How did you know?" she asked.

Kate just smiled and tapped her head. "What's going on?"

"My mom made me go to a church rummage sale with her today..."

"Ok..." Kate said not following her train of thought.

"Oh my God it was awful! Everybody stared at me and started whispering. One lady even came up to me and asked me if I knew that I was carrying an abomination," she said as she started to cry.

"Oh honey," Kate said as she took her in her arms. She rubbed her back and smoothed her hair as she spoke next.

"They don't know you Liz. They don't know all the shit you've been through. Forget them!"

"That's easy for you to say Kate. You're not the one harboring an 'abomination'. God I wish I could feel like you...but all I feel is dirty."

"It's alright," Kate said as she continued her rubbing her back.

"I can't take it anymore Kate. I really can't."

"What do you mean?" Kate asked confused. All she got back in response was Lizzie sobbing in her arms.


	8. bathtubs and toilets

Ch 8- Bathtubs and Toilets

"Ok so you owe us...$475," the young girl smiled. Gordo pulled out a check and filled in the information and handed it over. He nodded his thanks as he slid the ring into his jacket pocket. It was a gorgeous ring, and it only contained a few monthly payments. All she had to do now is say yes.

Lizzie sighed as she made her way to the bathroom. God she felt nasty. Hopefully a shower would help cheer her up before Gordo came over. She started to shed her clothes as she stepped in front of the mirror. Good Lord, she was huge. But in about two months or so, she'd be back to normal. If she only knew what normal was. With that thought in mind, she crossed to the bathtub and decided instead to take a bath.

"Tonight's the night," he said excitedly.

"Do you think she's ready for this?" her voice crackled with concern.

"Miranda, we've known each other our whole lives and we love each other! Plus I also think it's the thing to do with her being pregnant and all."

"So if for example, this happened to...Kate, you'd still do this?" she asked quizzically.

"Yup. Only I don't know if I'd be as happy. I'm doing this because I knew from seventh grade that one day I was going to marry Lizzie McGuire. Baby or no baby."

His best friend looked at him and just smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing! That's so sweet though."

He gathered her up in a hug and sighed. "I'm really doing this huh?"

She nodded, tears in her eyes. "I picked a great weekend to come home huh?" she laughed. She gathered herself together and then asked to see the ring.

"I hope she likes it..." he said as he produced a white gold ring with two hearts. One was diamond and one was ruby.

"Why are there two and why different colors?" Miranda asked confused.

"Well I wanted to get her a diamond and it just so happens her birthday is in April. Mine is in July. So therefore, two hearts. Hers and mine as well."

"Ok you need to leave!" Miranda exclaimed as her vision blurred again. He laughed ruefully and headed for the door. "Call me and let me know what happens!" she yelled after him.

In order to have a proper soak, in Lizzie's mind, you need music. So she wrapped herself in a towel and began the hunt for the perfect CD. Finally, after five minutes, she found it. She had made a mixed CD the other day that she liked to think of as the soundtrack for her life. She popped it in as Spoon's "The Way We Get By" began to play.

Gordo smiled to himself as he walked up to Lizzie's door. He had stopped off at the flower store on the corner and picked up her favorite one's, tulips. This was going to be perfect.

"Liz!" he called out as he entered her house. He received no answer. He bounded up the stairs, ring in pocket and flowers in hand, and barged into her empty bedroom. At that he started to slowly go through her house, not finding her. Finally he came to the bathroom where he could faintly hear music. Looking down he noticed how his shoes squished on the carpet. _Her toilet must have overflowed again_ he thought to himself. Gordo tried the door handle, but it was locked.

"Babe you need some help?" he called out to her as he knocked. No answer.

"Liz?"

When no answer came yet again, he tried the door knob for a second time. When that failed he started to bang on the door. He knew she was in there; music and lights were on.

"Open the door!" he yelled getting a little worried. He backed up and charged the door. Feeling it budge a smidge of an inch, he reared his leg back and started to attack. Finally about five good kicks later, he was able to enter.

"Liz?" he asked again confused, not seeing her. It was then that he noticed where the water was coming from.

"No. No, no, no..." he muttered to himself as he cautiously walked over to the tub. There she was, the love his life, mother of his child, floating.

"Liz!" he cried as he stuck an Adidas clad foot into the overflowing bathtub. He picked her up urgently and started to cry as her head flopped back and her mouth opened lifelessly.

"Liz!!" he started to yell as he shook her. "Wake up...please baby...just wake up..." he started but eventually gave way to his gut wrenching sobs.

"I think we better tell Lizzie before we tell my parents," the boy said quietly to his girlfriend.

"We can't do this...we're still in high school!"

"Well it's here now. Yeah we're only juniors, but we can make it work."

"Matt..."

In response, the tall 16 year old just kissed his girlfriend and headed to his car. Lizzie was less likely to freak out than their parents, especially because she, herself, was also pregnant. Matt hadn't seen his sister in a while and he actually missed her-which is why he suggested going over there. He swiped his hair out of his eyes and started up his Honda. Somewhere along the lines in life, he had had a major growth spurt and he now stood at 5'11". He let his hair grow out from that spiky do he used to have and it now lay across his forehead in soft straightness. He was still skinny as hell, but now he added muscle to his physique as well. Soccer will do that to you. In truth, Matt McGuire had grown up to be a good looking, well liked guy. He had been with Melina since middle school, but high school had been where they decided to take it serious. One night at a party, they both had too much to drink and woke up next to each other the next morning...naked. A few weeks later Melina had informed him that she thought she was pregnant. It turned out that she was and Matt determined to be a damn good father; regardless of his past or his age. He looked over now at the blonde girl sitting next to him and entwined his fingers with hers.

"Everything'll be fine," he reassured her.

She gave him a small, tight smile in return.

"Gordo what the hell are you doing?" Matt asked about ten minutes later as he stood in the doorway.

"Move! NOW!!!" he barked at him when he saw the stretcher being carried up the stairs.

"What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On?" Matt asked slowly. Gordo finally got up and climbed out of the tub for Matt to see.

"No...she's faking. She used to do it to me all the time to hear me scream like a girl," he explained.

Gordo just looked at him, dripping water on the floor, and then reached over and slapped her to prove his point.

"Don't EVER hit-"

"LOOK!!!"

Matt turned to look and saw no change.

"But...why..." he asked softly, finally grasping the situation.

"I don't know...I really don't know," Gordo answered him honestly, tears still streaming down his face as he watched the medics cover his girlfriend with a tarp. For the first time in their lives, the two young men clung to each other, sobbing, and wouldn't let go. As they did, the last words from Lizzie's CD flooded the room.

"Welcome to my life..."

a/n: **this is not the final chapter!!!** and i decided to throw matt in there...well b/c i can honestly. and i just realized that so far everyone has been having sex...but w/matt adn melina i'm thinking a/b making a sequel. let me know if y'all think that's a good idea. sorry that i changed it all again...it was rated R for a short time but it seemed like no one would read it or know it was there except for my faithful reviewers (y'all rock that found me!! make me smile all day...)


	9. the journal

Ch 9- The journal

Gordo sank to his knees by Lizzie's bed. He still couldn't believe that she was gone. After close to nineteen years of loving her, she was gone. He finally realized that he had to go through her things and figure out what to donate and what to keep. It had been two days since he had even entered this house and he was a little apprehensive about it. He looked at Miranda who was by the door and sighed. He had the ugly duty to inform her of what had happened and then had to hold her as she cried for a whole day. It was miracle that he even got her out here today. As it was she was leaning against the doorframe and trying not to cry. In Miranda's mind, this was Lizzie's sacred place. The place she could come every day and be herself. All Miranda could see was Lizzie laughing on her bed when she was on the phone, Lizzie crying on the bed after her and Gordo had a fight. She finally stepped hesitantly inside the room, afraid to disrupt anything. She didn't want to touch anything or step in the wrong place. Even if Lizzie was gone, this was still her place. Her place of escape and Miranda wanted to keep it that way.

"Andy, it's ok. You can touch things," Gordo said quietly reading her mind.

She smiled tightly at him and got down on her knees as well. "It's just so weird. I never thought I'd be doing this," she answered him.

"None of us did."

She just nodded and grew quiet.

"Hey, they saved the baby didn't they?" she asked, almost as an afterthought.

Gordo grew really quiet and looked as though he was going to cry.

"Oh my God I am so sorry Gordo," she said as she moved to his side.

"No! They did save it. It's just…I don't know if I can do this. I'm nineteen, I can't raise a child!"

"Gordo, if you could do it with Lizzie, then you can do it now."

"Miranda…"

"We'll all help you."

"I know. I'll have to think about it."

"Think about it?? This isn't like you not going to college! This is a baby, it's not like you can't just shove it back in if you don't want it," she exclaimed.

"I know that!" he yelled at her. "She's still in the hospital. I mean she was a month and a half premature. I don't even know if she'll make it," he then said quietly.

"What are you going to do if she does make it?"

"I don't know yet," he said.

"Does she have a name?" Miranda asked softly then.

"Brooke. Lizzie's middle name."

Miranda just looked at him then and hugged him for a long time while they both just cried.

Matt tapped on the glass at the hospital. That was his niece in there.

"Hold on honey, hold on," he whispered to her.

"Matt?" a girls voice that he didn't recognize came from behind. Matt turned around and saw a tall girl with dirty blonde hair.

"Yeah?"

"You probably don't remember me. I used to come over a lot in high school…like my sophomore year."

"Wait…it's Kate isn't it?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yeah."

Matt just nodded silently while looking at her. "Umm…what are you doing here?" he asked finally.

"The baby. I come up here at least once a day to see her."

"Really?" he asked surprised.

Kate just nodded. That baby was remnants of her friend. Lizzie needed help and nobody gave it to her; Kate would be damned if the same thing happened again.

"How's she doing?" she asked at last.

"Still no change. They think she might make it but it's still up in the air." Kate just stared at the little girl in the incubator hooked up to the wires and came up and put an arm around Matt.

"She'll be fine. If she's as strong as her mother was, then she'll make it. Lizzie was a fighter."

"Just not an informer apparently," Matt muttered.

"I think I found something," Miranda said a few hours later.

Gordo popped his head up. "What?"

Miranda in turn held up a pink spiral notebook with doodles all over it.

"So?"

"I think this is her journal. Listen, this is dated a week ago.

I rolled out of bed this morning  
Heaving a great big sigh  
Another day for me to sit  
To watch TV  
To read my books  
To sit and wish I had a life  
I secretly dream  
Of going out with a bunch of popular people  
Or having at least one popular friend  
Somebody who could find time in their busy life  
For little old me  
For the last three weeks  
I've sat around doing nothing  
Sure I've been out with my boyfriend  
But even I'm starting to think  
That the feels it's his duty to entertain me  
Oh how I wish, just for once  
I could be the life of some party  
That I actually had some friends  
More than just three  
People always tell me  
In order to have friends  
I need to be friendly  
Well friendship is a two way street  
And telling me I'm an abomination  
Just doesn't work  
So when they stop harassing me  
Maybe I'll try  
Until then  
Here I sit, wishing my life away"

"Whoa. She wrote that?" Gordo asked.

Miranda just nodded silently. "I never knew she felt that way," she whispered.

"None of us did," he said again.

"It's like she was waiting to die. I mean, why didn't she say anything?"

Gordo just shrugged his shoulders. He was just trying to take it all in. He had the journal now and he turned to the next page.

"Sometimes I wish I could just get out. I feels so smothered! Gordo's great and all…it's just…sometimes I feel as though he wants me to be something different. So I try to change myself so he'll be happy and I'm unhappy. I'm already unhappy. He says he loves me like I am, but I really have my doubts. Who could really love me? Honestly? I love him, I really do, and I'm afraid he'll leave me, but I just can't change. No matter how much I try, I can't. I dunno…he's probably just better off without me."

"I can't do this," Gordo said as he stood up abruptly. Miranda looked at him, surprised.

"Gordo…"

"I'm sorry," he muttered as he made his way out of the house. Miranda just sat back on her butt and stared after him. She sighed, exasperated, as she started to pick up her things again. She was determined to do this, with out or with out Gordo.

"Mr. McGuire?" a man said. Matt turned around with Kate.

"Yes?"

"You daughter-"

"What? Oh no. I'm Lizzie's brother, that's my niece."

"Very well then. Brooke has made a turn."

"A turn? What does a turn mean?" Kate asked confused.

"It means that she can go home soon. Congratulations," he said before walking away.

Matt and Kate turned to each other, eyes wide. "She can go home? She can go home!!" Matt whooped in the hallway hugging Kate. "I need to tell Mom!"

"Should I tell Gordo?" Kate asked.

"Umm…would you mind I did?" he asked.

"No! Of course you can! I'll wait right here." With that Matt ran down the hall to the payphone to tell his parents the good news.

Miranda's cell phone rang in Lizzie's room as she was still going through things.

"Hey," she said as she picked up.

"Andy?" Gordo's voice came, thick with tears.

"Gordo! What happened?" she asked urgently.

"It's Brooke. She's coming home."

"That's great!!" she exclaimed, truly happy for her friend.

"I don't want her," he whispered.

"What?"

"I don't want her."

a/n: hey guys...do you want a sequel or no?? just a question


	10. rain

a/n: so this is it. The final chapter of my story…thank you to all that reviewed it!! I think I'm gonna be starting a sequel soon so read that when it comes out!! I hope y'all enjoy this story and final chapter…I almost cried while I was writing it!! And I'm mastermind behind it all!!!

Ch 10- Rain

The rain pounded down in sheets as Matt opened his eyes and gazed around his dark room. Today was the day. Today was the day that it really was all over. He groaned as he turned over and buried his head in his covers. Then a thought crossed his mind…_Happy Anniversary Mel_ he thought to his girlfriend bitterly silent.

"Miranda?" someone yelled as they pounded on her door. The brunette Latina dragged herself out of bed and unlatched her door.

"What do you want?" she asked automatically, her voice differing from the automated message that came first.

"Miranda…" she said softly, whimpering.

"I know, I know Kate," she said as she dragged her into her house and held her and cried for the first time since middle school.

Gordo wrapped the towel around himself and shook his curly mop of hair to rid of the residing water. He had a daughter. His would be/should be wife was dead. He literally had no one anymore. He gave Brooke up for adoption without even seeing her. He made the adoption agency swear that they wouldn't change her name and then signed on the dotted line. Some nice family somewhere was happy, that's all he knew.

"How can we let him do this?" Jo whispered to her husband that morning snuggled against his chest.

"Who do what?" he asked confused, half asleep half awake.

"Gordo! That's our grand daughter and she's gone because he didn't want her!!" she exclaimed swatting him.

"There's nothing we can do about it now sweetie," Sam said softly to his wife, knowing how sensitive the subject was. "I'm sure Brooke is with, or on the way, to some nice family somewhere," he said trying to reassure her.

"THIS is a nice family. WE'RE a nice family!! What the hell was he thinking?? No, you know what? He wasn't thinking. He's nineteen, he doesn't know what he's doing, who he's affecting or anything…"

"Shh…it's ok honey, it's ok…"

"No it's not Sam! It's not ok, it will never be ok with me!" she yelled as she got up and stalked to the bathroom.

Matt looked at his blonde girlfriend. She had to be crazy. Melina wanted to tell his parents today…today of all days!!!

"You have to be crazy," he muttered as he zipped up his trouser pants.

"Why? Because I'm tired of lying? Because I want a little more fucking support?" she said her voice rising slightly.

"No!! Because you have to do it today. That would be great…'Hey mom, I know that we're laying your only daughter in the ground today and you just got your grand-daughter taken from you, but Melina and I are pregnant.' Yeah, that would be swell," he said sarcastically.

"You know what would be swell? If you'd just start acting like a man instead of the twelve year old I once knew!" she yelled as she stalked out of his room. Matt sighed and ran his hand through his hair. This was going to be a great day, he could feel it.

"Mr. and Mrs. McGuire, I have something to tell you," Melina said as she walked into the kitchen. The couple looked up, looking tired and near exhaustion, but she couldn't turn back now. She had come this far and wasn't going to finish it with some corny line of how she knew it was hard for them today.

"I'm pregnant."

Sam and Jo just looked at her and looked at each other. "Whatever you do, keep it," Sam said. "Gordo gave Brooke up for adoption and it is killing us."

"Wait, you're not mad?" Matt said from behind.

"Mad? No, we're beyond mad. We're just glad that you told us so now we can help you. Melina, if you need anything…" Jo trailed off.

"Thank you Mrs. McGuire," she said hugging the women that was like her second mother. Matt just stood back surveying the scene until the doorbell rang a minute later.

"It's time," he said.

"Lizzie was always really good in math. I remember one day she helped me figure out some pre-cal question…she was only in algebra two!!" a girl exclaimed as she walked around Gordo, Miranda and Kate.

"That's how I want her to be remembered. By giving answers to homework," Kate retorted. Miranda just squeezed her hand in response.

"When did you two become best friends?" Gordo asked suddenly.

"When she showed up today crying and we figured out we had something in common. We both didn't want to come today," Miranda said in response. Gordo just nodded, pushing his hands into his suit pockets.

"Gordo, I think the service is about to start," Matt said as he came up behind him. The older boy just patted the younger on the shoulder and gathered up the two girls and headed into the sanctuary.

"Lizzie was always thinking of others. She always helped others, math problems or family problems, she would help," Miranda stated. She was slated as one of the talkers…after all Lizzie was her best friend right? There was no way in hell she was going to badmouth her in front of everyone and their mom. So she decided to tell of the old Lizzie…the one that few remembered or didn't know. She finished quickly and headed back to her seat next to Kate and just sobbed.

"Next David Gordon would like to say a few words," the pastor said quietly.

Gordo made his way up to the pulpit. He started to pull out some note cards that he had prepared for this, but then thought better of it. He wasn't going to lie like Miranda did.

"The Lizzie that Miranda spoke of existed many years ago. That Lizzie died somewhere between the summer before ninth grade and tenth grade. You all knew Lizzie. We all knew she partied, smoked up, got drunk and whatever else under the sun. Most of us called her a slut, myself included once or twice. Sure I tried to cut her out of my life several times. But I never could. I would see her, her blonde hair swirling in the breeze, her laughter floating across the courtyard. I could see her walking down the halls with us in middle school, smiling like she didn't have a care in the world. I would always come crawling back to her. She used me, yes. But I loved her, I still do. After she told me of our daughter…" he paused while his voice broke. _Come on Gordon…get it together!_ He yelled at himself.

"After she told me of our daughter, I couldn't leave. From fifth grade, probably even before that, I knew I was going to marry Elizabeth McGuire, and now I would have the chance to. She always acted happy to everyone in these last months, but I saw what few got to besides Miranda and Kate. I had to see Lizzie crash and burn repeatedly for getting harassed by people that didn't understand her. Hell, I didn't understand her! But I loved her. I was going to propose you know?" he said suddenly going off on his own tangent.

"I had the ring in my pocket, tulips from down the street; I was ready and bursting with excitement. I went to her house and couldn't find her. It never dawned on me that she would do this. I thought her toilet overflowed again. How stupid is that? She was crying for months and I never saw this coming. Finding her that day was like finding myself. Lizzie was my other half, she was my love. She was the one that convinced me to stop smoking pot, she was the one who gave me hope for my future. I loved her and she couldn't let me know. She couldn't say something to me to let me know how much pain she felt…" he stopped there, not being able to continue. The whole room was silent as he made his way away from the pulpit; everyone was drying their eyes. They all watched him gather up his jacket and bolt from the building, his two friends behind him. They all heard him sobbing as he sat down on the stairs outside. They all felt what he felt right then. Whore or no whore. Bitch or no bitch. Lizzie must have been a real person for a person like Gordo to feel so much for her.

The pastor ended the ceremony after that and they all assembled in the graveyard. A few people walked around the coffin and placed a rose on it. Most people just kept their distance, too afraid to go over there because of how bad they felt after hearing her fiancé pour his heart out to a room full of people he didn't know. Finally it came time to lower the casket in the ground. Sam had to escort Jo away because she could not get a hold of herself. If it hadn't been for Sam, she would have jumped on top of the coffin and have been buried with it. The three friends stood directly in front of it and said their separate goodbyes. Kate's consisted of a letter for only Lizzie to see saying how sorry she was she wasn't there for her but she would try to find her daughter and do better for her. Miranda just looked at the shrine that encased her friend and mentally ran through everything her and Lizzie had been through in their lives. The two girls were crying silently within two minutes and had to walk away to wait for the boy. Gordo, like Miranda, looked at the coffin and then put the ring he bought, entwined with a rose, on the cover. He kissed the lid of it gently and whispered "I love you. Give them hell up there Liz," before walking away. As he did, it began to rain gently again. Tears mixed with the precipitation from everyone as they watched from a distance the three friends hold hands and walk away. They had their closure, it was everyone else that had no idea what to do. One by one, they all started to slowly depart until it was finally just the gravedigger. The gravedigger noticed Gordo's ring and picked up carefully to examine it. He shouldn't, he knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help himself. He pocketed the ring and tossed the rose back on the mystery person's casket. Whoever it was didn't need that ring right now, that's for sure. Slowly but surely he tossed the dirt on the lowered coffin until all that was left of Elizabeth Brooke McGuire was the headstone.

"Elizabeth Brooke McGuire  
1988-2006  
Beloved daughter, friend, and mother"

a/n (again): I know that it's kinda unrealistic to have the gravedigger do that, but just go with it…trust me. i was also guessing on lizzie's age but to me that kinda fits. she would have graduated and teh others would have started school by then....


End file.
